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Archive for: Bruce Di Marsico

+ The best way to be happy now

[ Posted on 11.21.2018 ]

The Option Method is a fantastic way to change direction when you aren’t feeling the way you want to feel. As quick and effective as it can be, there is even a quicker way to turn yourself around. The first is be happy. Remind yourself that regardless of what you are feeling, your ultimate goal is really to be happy, so why not go there? Ask yourself what you are doing to stand in the way of your happiness? Would it be okay, just for now, to step aside and let it happen? Whatever you think it might cost you, ask yourself if that is really true and see what happens. Second, look at how you are feeling about what you are feeling. Yes, I said, how you are feeling about what you are feeling. Most feelings will pass quickly if we don’t hold onto them. Ever stub your toe?…

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+ Can The Option Method help with guilt and shame?

[ Posted on 02.16.2018 ]

Our focus this month has been on guilt and shame, two sides of the coin of self judgment.  Do you know the difference?  Check out Google “What is the difference between Guilt and Shame?”  and you will find more than 10 million entries. Brene Brown has a simple way to define it: “the difference between shame and guilt is the difference between ‘I am bad’ and ‘I did something bad’.” I’d go further and say both guilt and shame stem from the belief that I am bad.  Saying I did something bad – in the sense that we feel guilty (or bad) about it, is the same as saying I am bad. Otherwise we would never feel bad about it. We would simply observe – Oh I did something that caused xyz to happen. Think about something you feel guilty about and ask yourself this question: If I didn’t feel…

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+ Will your real self please stand up!

[ Posted on 02.18.2016 ]

Why do so many of us view our real self as the one who instigates pain, blame and guilt?  As the one who is haunted by the fear of what might be?  As the one who is responsible for all our emotional foibles,  missteps, angst and sufferings? Can we know that we play a part in our unhappiness without considering it to be our natural default and the totality of who we are?  Where does our happiness fit in?  Is it also a reflection of our real self? Bruce Di Marsico put it this way – “Since to be truly happy we must believe we can be, we have to see this quality as one of our own, as coming from our real self.  We have to know that we wouldn’t be wanting to be happy unless it was about to emerge from us.  Where we are now and are…

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+ Is Happiness Your Road Not Taken?

[ Posted on 09.14.2015 ]

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. I learned Robert Frost’s The Road Not Taken when I was a kid in grammar school and it has stayed with me all these years.   I especially love these last three lines, which for me, sum up what it means to follow your own heart, even if it leads you down an unfamiliar path.  I love to think about this within the context of happiness and unhappiness.  If you were presented with two paths in any given situation, one to happiness – the other to unhappiness – however you imagine it, which path do you think you would take? Most of us would probably say, I would always choose the path to happiness.  After all, who wouldn’t want to be happy?  Why would we ever choose otherwise?  Who…

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+ Can you say “Yes!” to happiness today?

[ Posted on 03.28.2014 ]

“Say Yes! to happiness! Always, only say ‘Yes!’ to happiness. Say ‘Yes’ to happiness at all times in all places, and bring all the blessings of happiness forward that will well up within you. Happiness is always present to you. Just say ‘Yes.’ A nod will do.” Bruce M. Di Marsico, The Myth of Unhappiness, Volume 3  

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The Option Method is the second-best method I know of for being happy. The first-best method is simp…

The Option Method is the second-best method I know of for being happy. The first-best method is simply to be happy. What The Option Method is for is to help people examine why they believe they need to be unhappy.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]