I have plenty of opportunities to practice dialog with my massage clients. Since your workshop I feel more comfortable, stuck less often and much more…[ Joe Graham ] >
Bruce M. Di Marsico and The Creation of The Option Method.
In the late 1960’s a psychotherapist named Bruce M. Di Marsico set out to understand the nature of unhappiness. He knew in his heart that happiness is our natural state. Why, then, he wondered were people so unhappy so much of the time? Why, even when they were happy, did that happiness seem tentative and fragile?
Through his work, Bruce realized that people create their reality, their personalities, emotions and point of view; by means of the beliefs they choose – about themselves, others, the world, God. When it comes to unhappiness, a primary belief is that we can be made to be unhappy against our will. In other words, unhappiness can happen to us. With that belief, people believe that the causes of their unhappiness are things that are “bad” or “wrong”, even “evil” - things that “should not happen.”
He created The Option Method in the late 60s as a result of decisions he made about the nature of unhappiness and happiness. He defined unhappiness as “the feeling (belief) that a degree of happiness is threatened and one is, to a degree, helpless to be happy. The belief (feeling) about the degree of threat, and how helpless one is, produces exactly, the degree of the profoundness and the nature of the emotion; from slight to extreme. Unhappiness is a good model word for what people describe as bad or uncomfortable feelings – feelings that they need to stop in order to feel good.”
His goal was to create a method that would lead others to emotional freedom and open the way to expansion of consciousness and even enlightenment. Bruce had a vision of the possibility of freedom from unhappiness for everyone, no matter the circumstances. This is one of the essential ingredients of The Option Method –that happiness is who we are and there is nothing we need do to be happy except to free ourselves from unhappiness. This is one reason why The Method is so transformative for so many people; it allows them to see, perhaps for the first time in their lives, that their happiness is not contingent upon getting and having things. What could be more freeing!! As Bruce said, "It is apparent from The Option Method that what people actually need to be happy is the confidence that their happiness cannot be threatened, and therefore they do not need to fear the helpless feeling that happiness will be taken away."
While Bruce was a psychotherapist, he ultimately expanded the practice of The Option Method from a therapy to what is essentially a personal growth and development tool. He did not believe the practice of the Method should be limited in any way except that the practitioner be trained in The Method through an understanding of the underlying attitude and principles, and most important, "through their own continuous experience of consciously, deliberately wanting to eliminate their unhappiness..."
I cannot adequately express my thanks for the perspective on life and on myself that Wendy Dolber has helped me awaken to during the past few months. …[ Robert H ] >
All that people want is to be happy. Happiness is the ultimate desire. Happiness is the prime mover.…
All that people want is to be happy. Happiness is the ultimate desire. Happiness is the prime mover. Happiness is the goal of all desires.[ Bruce Di Marsico ]