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[ Valerie Gilbert, NYC ] >

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+ Can We Have Our Treats and Eat Them Too?

[ Posted on 08.01.2020 ]

What is there about impending summer that inspires me to eat ice cream? Delicious, cold, creamy, delectable ice cream! And why does this always happen just about the time I am taking stock of my summer body? Under the cover of winter wools, fleeces and flannels, I can delude myself into thinking that I can still strut my stuff at the beach of my choice. But when the calendar flips around to May and June, I turn on my critical eye and take a really good look. Oh, was that there last year? Now, the truth is I love ice cream no matter what the season. But the memories of past summers  riding my bike after the ice cream trucks of my youth – slurping down that delightful double scooped cone on a hot, hot beach – makes summer ice cream all the more “irresistible”. Thing is, I’m not the…

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+ Am I responsible for what happens in the world?

[ Posted on 07.28.2020 ]

In The Valkyries, Paolo Coelho says: We are responsible for everything that happens in this world. We are the warriors of the light. With the strength of our love and of our will, we can change our destiny, as well as the destiny of others. As I read this, I thought about what it means to be responsible for everything that happens in the world. Knowing that we are responsible is not a condemnation, nor is it an accolade. It is an acknowledgement that we are all connected and that our thoughts and actions have meaning in the world beyond the minute space that we occupy. Just reading that statement: “We are responsible for everything that happens in this world” opens up a channel of communication and connection. All of a sudden, my personal space opens up and beams out to the world. What I do and don’t do. What I say…

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+ What are you holding on to when you hold on to anger?

[ Posted on 07.26.2020 ]

Time heals all wounds, or so it is said. Think about a time when you grieved every day over the loss of a loved one. Think about something that made you so angry you couldn’t stop thinking about it. What about that embarrassing moment so long ago that you thought you would never get over? Do you still feel the same way today? Chances are as with so many things, with time, things change, memories fade and we move on. Unless we don’t. You’re fine until the anniversary of the death of a loved one. You’re at peace until someone reminds you about that thing that made you so angry. You find yourself sharing in the embarrassment of others a little too empathically. If time truly heals all wounds, why are we still suffering? With time, new experiences and the relevancy of the event to daily life, we do move…

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+ Questioning Unhappiness with The Option Method

[ Posted on 03.03.2020 ]

What is your definition of happiness?  Many of us answer this question by identifying the things that “make” us happy.  A great vacation.  A new love.  Quality family time.  Try listing five things, ten things, twenty things that you believe make you happy.  It’s a fun exercise and it feels great.  That’s because we love thinking about the things that make us happy.  If you imagine the wonderful vacation you are going on next week, you already feel good just thinking about it. Ah, the sleeping late, the pina colada by the pool, that great novel you’ve been dying to read.  It’s going to be great!  We are feeling good because we are anticipating being happy in the future. Depending on our expectations, we can feel completely different about the same event.  For example, how would you feel about that same vacation if you were anticipating getting food poisoning, sunburn…

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+ Door #1 or Door#2. How can you love decision-making?

[ Posted on 02.23.2020 ]

One of the stumbling blocks to making a decision for many people is knowing the right thing to do. If I pick Door #1, will it turn out okay for me? Will it be better than Door #2? They struggle with trying to figure out what the best thing to do is. When it comes to making decisions, we can all profit by doing the research necessary to figure these things out. Whether it’s a trusted friend, colleague, doctor or the all-important and ever-expanding Mr. Google, information gathering can help us tremendously. But do you ever find yourself cycling through more and more questions and research, delaying that moment when you make the final choice? Cringing at the what if’s? and imagined regrets? When you are fearful of the outcome, it isn’t the best time to make a decision. So instead of pushing yourself into something that you can’t feel…

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No thing in the world gives happiness. No thing or lack of any thing causes unhappiness. Happiness i…

No thing in the world gives happiness. No thing or lack of any thing causes unhappiness. Happiness is.

[ Bruce Di Marsico ]